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No One Will Let Her LiveWomen's Struggle for Well-Being in a Delhi Slum$
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Claire Snell-Rood

Print publication date: 2015

Print ISBN-13: 9780520284807

Published to California Scholarship Online: September 2016

DOI: 10.1525/california/9780520284807.001.0001

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PRINTED FROM CALIFORNIA SCHOLARSHIP ONLINE (www.california.universitypressscholarship.com). (c) Copyright University of California Press, 2018. All Rights Reserved. Under the terms of the licence agreement, an individual user may print out a PDF of a single chapter of a monograph in CALSO for personal use (for details see www.california.universitypressscholarship.com/page/535/privacy-policy-and-legal-notice).date: 19 December 2018

“You Should Live for Others”

“You Should Live for Others”

Tensely Sustaining Families and Selves

Chapter:
(p.42) 1 “You Should Live for Others”
Source:
No One Will Let Her Live
Author(s):

Claire Snell-Rood

Publisher:
University of California Press
DOI:10.1525/california/9780520284807.003.0001

Chapter 2 explores how women asserted their own strength in the midst of domestic violence and neglect. Drawing on sustained observations of families, private conversations with women, and formal interviews about family care, this chapter contrasts women’s ideals of family with the frustration of enacting them in daily life. Being a good person, they explained, meant “living for others.” At the same time, they asserted to family the care they deserved. The ability to sustain their own caregiving demonstrated their powerful faith and closer proximity toward a selfless ideal. Yet exercising such strength was an emotional and physical struggle that wore women down. Nearly every woman had broken ties of marriage or family. Keeping these histories secret, however, ensured that the women themselves, rather than neighbors, had the ability to judge their moral meaning. These mental-health strategies enabled women to make claims for their own health needs within their unequal family relationships. Through embodying the value of living for others, somewhat ironically, women cultivated the strength of their individual selves.

Keywords:   family, care, caregiving, domestic violence, relational well-being, self, faith

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